Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Because I love an angry man...

And have in the past been known to share my life with other angry men I have a deep understanding of the contradiction that is our societies solution to the battered and abused women issue.

We have gone to such great lengths to provide hidden shelters, counselling and financial assistance to the multitude of women out there who have found themselves in a situation that may endanger the safety and security of both them and their children; a movement I wholeheartedly applaud and support.

It confuses me however, that with so much evidence pointing in the direction of there being a serious problem within our society regarding anger and control issues that we have done almost nothing to provide the same support for men that we are so willing and able to provide for women.
As far as I can see, we have only provided a band aid solution and have not taken the time to seek out the solutions to the root cause of these troubles. Now this is not to say that the women’s shelters are not needed, indeed they are and will continue to be unless something is done about the men who batter and abuse. However, it seems to me that waiting until the man lashes out and physically harms a woman or a child and then treating him while he is paying is debt to society while sitting in a jail cell is just not an efficient way to solve the problem.

Again, I have to point out that it is not only men who do the abusing, and I am certainly not trying to imply that women are not equally capable of violence; I am making the observation that services are available for women, free and supported both by government and independent organizations. What about the men? What is available for them?

There are free drug programmes... There are free alcohol programmes... and if you go to jail for more than two years in Canada, there are free counselling and anger management programmes available for the inmates... wonderful...

So we wait it seems, for the men to suffer a break down and commit a crime that is serious enough to land them in federal prison, or for them to become dependent on a substance that helps to ease the weight of whatever burden they are carrying. It is only once they have hit bottom, and lost the trust and support of their family and friends through desperate action that we the people offer to help them turn their lives around. It is an unjust and unbalanced system and it is a system that needs to be changed.
Now many would argue that there is a social stigma that disallows men to reach out for help, that their male ego, fearful of admitting weakness may get in the way. I argue that we provide hidden centres for women so that they may remove themselves from society for however long it takes them to heal. Many women who have been victims of abuse, rape and other violent crimes have found their way to safe havens, where they can safely rebuild their lives away from the prying and often judgemental eyes of the public. Why can we not provide the same for men?

Others may argue that abusers are not aware of their anger issues, that they do not know that they need help and not knowing means that they will not willingly seek out the help that they need. I argue that this is just not so. That any man who has hit a child or a woman knows he has done wrong, he knows that he has hurt somebody he loves and he knows also that the feelings of guilt that come after the act of rage are not feelings he would like to continue to feel. What he does not know is how to stop...
So then you say, but there are so many counselling programmes out there, and so many independent Dr’s who provide counselling services, why do we need more. The problem is not a lack of services, the problem is a lack of FREE or government subsidized services. The problem is that is can cost hundreds, even thousands of dollars to sign up for and attend some of the programmes available to men. Anger management does not come cheap and in today’s troubled financial times as the burden on men to provide for their families becomes heavier the need to provide them with a way to deal with their growing frustration becomes more desperate.

I simply cannot condone a system that continues to treat the symptoms and does nothing to find a cure for the disease; it is like treating the pain of a broken bone and doing nothing to re-align the bone so that it may heal. So how do we build a splint that will help the bone to knit?
The problem to me seems overwhelming and I am at a loss as to where to start except to say that thinking about the problem and recognizing that there is indeed a problem to begin with is a sure fire way to begin the journey that ends in finding a solution. So today I am thinking about the problem, and realizing that it is there and that it needs to be addressed and hoping against hope that the right people will come along to help to build a system that provides the same support to the men in our lives that has been thanks to the tireless efforts of so many been providing for us women in the past.

Jean Victoria Norloch

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

In Support of the 99% :) Unity for Humanity and Fair Treatment for ALL!!! I thank you...

Three years ago when I began writing and calling out to the hearts of my readers many people told me I was crazy... When I looked around at our world and I cried out through my work as an author and blogger that there must be a change many people told me it would never come...
They told me that humans were naturally selfish, naturally greedy and that the divisions and sorrows that had plagued the human race for centuries could not be overcome. They told it wasn’t worth it, that I was putting my faith in a lost cause. I told them I had faith, not only in a higher power that protects and shelters but in the human beings who are the living breathing manifestation of that power...
EVERYTHING I have written has been because I BELIEVED that the world could and would CHANGE for the BETTER and that mankind could and would UNITE with ONE HEART – ONE MIND – ONE VOICE for FREEDOM – The first words I ever published we “This week I started a revolution...”
The last few paragraphs of my first novel were...

I was not sure the dream had a place in this story. I was
hoping that this time the darkness might be held at bay. I realize
now that the opposite of light has its place here. It is what gives us
balance. It is a struggle that has been wrestled with before. It is a
battle we have already fought, a war we must continue to strive to
win. It would be wrong for me to deny it its place here, so I will
include it in these pages as a message to those who read them.
We are here.
We will fight.
In that fight there will be loss of life, loss of self; yet from
the blood and ash comes forth hope for another chance for his
people to survive.
We are here.
We will fight.
We will suffer willingly, selflessly sacrificing for a chance to
make change.
We are here.
We will fight.
If we are lucky, if the Creator wills it, in the end there will
be victory for the people.
We are here.
We will fight.
And if we are destined not to win this battle, we will return
to fight again.
Like a phoenix born out of the ashes, we will rise to begin a
new life, a new battle, and, with that battle, a new hope.
From time immemorial, we have returned.
It is an old tale; one you have heard, one you have read and
one your soul knows to be true
When you read these pages, when you hear the call, will you
heed it?
We are here.
We still fight.
Do we fight alone?
Will you close your eyes, your minds, and your hearts?
Or will you join us in this quest for knowledge?
Will you walk with us the path?
Will you willingly seek out the answers?
Will you open yourself to the possibility of what this world
could be, or will you turn away?
Out of legend, from the beginning of time, the story
unfolds to yet again reveal to the world the one thing we have been
sent here to discover...


Jean Victoria Norloch's Truth: Novel Page 331

That was over 3 yrs ago, a though my faith in individuals has from time to time wavered my faith in HUMANITY and a WHOLE has remained strong...

Through all the bitterness and defeat – despite all those who came to me and said THEY WILL NEVER CHANGE... you stayed strong...

Many people told me that one voice could not change the world – and my answer has always been but I AM NOT ALONE... There are thousands of you out there – millions of you who heard the call of man and answered in your own way... So many independent writers, artists, musicians, makers of film, teachers, healers and countless others who gave of themselves to work towards a day of unity... There are far too many to name, too many countries even to count who have contributed to this global movement for change...

I put out this short video not so long ago a reading of a blog I wrote months ago to tell the NAYSAYERS that my faith in mankind would never falter...

Today I write to you to say thank you... For all that I have been and all that I am – for all that I have seen and believed – for all the love I have known cannot compare to what I feel for my brothers and sisters around the world today... YOU – ALL OF YOU have shown a strength and a solidarity unlike anything before seen on our planet...


I am honoured and privileged to be a human being living on Earth in these times and I thank you again ALL of you for having the STRENGTH to carry on...

For NEVER giving up – for NEVER giving in and for being the LOVE that defines us as a race...

For what I ask you could be a more powerful demonstration of God’s love for mankind than mankind’s love for one another...

With much love, endless gratitude and unwavering faith...

Jean Victoria Norloch

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Guru's and Bafoonery

When the student becomes the teacher...
What happens? Better yet how does it happen?
There is a balance here in our world that must be maintained – a very precarious balance that defines who and what we are – what in fact makes our world so very precious... a balance between all things opposite that make up the diversity and colourful tapestry that is life on our planet. In among the obvious; light and dark, male and female, good and evil, exists something many of us do not stop to consider. It is the realm of knowledge – I know vs. I do not know...
How hard is it for the average person to say those words? I don’t know...
How difficult is it for one to admit? I do not know...
So how does the one who has always had the answers suddenly become the one who is asking the questions? I don’t know, but I do know it happens...
More often than people are willing to admit the ones who have always been around to show us the way, to lift us up, to nullify our fears and reassure us in times of doubt, can disappear, fall, become fearful, lose confidence or become lost themselves. When this happens what in the world is a student to do? Take it as an opportunity to test your newly acquired skills and knowledge. Accept it as a test of your abilities. Were you listening? This we would very much like to know...
There is a danger in thinking you have all the answers – a danger in thinking your truth is the only right and real truth. A danger in fact in believing your message is the only valid message. This is not to say that your message is not important, of course it is or you would not be driven to share it yet who is to say it is the only message or the only way for others to find their way.
I met a man once; he was a good man with a good heart and a drive to help those in need. A healer he was who wished for all the world to see it as he saw; beautiful and full of light. He had a gift, an ability to see into the hearts of others and to recognize their sorrows. He made it his life’s work to focus on their pain, to explore the cause and effect of it, to work with them regardless of the cost to self until their pain was gone. He knew that he was only a vessel and a tool for the healing energies that others may not be able to for the moment for themselves control. He understood that deep within them they knew already the answers to their dilemma, that somewhere buried within they were aware of what caused them grief. He accepted that these things that they had ignored, pushed aside, refused to recognize were in fact poisoning them on a level that they may not for the moment comprehend or understand. He found himself in a position of a fond father, worried perhaps for the future of a child who he cared for, seeing a better way and all the while knowing that the answers when given may not be received willingly.
A good man, concerned for the wellbeing of his fellow man, having lived a full life and having seen a smoother path for those that would follow, intent on sharing what he had learned. A good man...
Yet somewhere along his path, this man who loved so deeply, this man who cared so much forgot to care for the one person who was in his life the most important. In looking into the hearts and minds of those he encountered he forgot for the moment to look into his own... In his attempts to heal other he forgot the importance of healing himself.
It is all too often proven true that in our attempts to ignore that within ourselves that is not complete we find it so much easier to focus our energies on that within others that seems to us to need to be fixed. This is how I think the student becomes the teacher, for when the teacher and guide has forgotten to care for that which in turn cares for and heals others it is up to the bravest and boldest of students to say – ‘no – wait stop...’
Do we?
Do we in life have the courage to face those who we have looked up to, admired, entrusted our health to? Do we as students of this life have the courage to tell them that perhaps this moment is not so much about looking at that within me that needs fixing but that within yourself that needs be addressed... Do we as students have the strength to let them know that they cannot not help us if they cannot help themselves? If we do not, then we were NOT listening...
I met a man, he cared for all those he met, dived deep into their hearts and did his best to heal the hurt that he found – why – because he was not yet willing to dive deep into his own and face the hurt he too had long ago buried and left behind...
I met a man...
Jean Victoria Norloch

Monday, October 3, 2011

Such an Honour...

to be asked to be a guest of such an amazing woman who has dedicated much of her own life to helping to uplift and inspire others...

Just a few days ago, Rick O'Shields and I were invited to come share an hour of our time with Ninon de Vere De Rosa, host of Voices of Tomorrow on Real Coaching Radio TV Network.  It was a fantastic experience with a remarkable flow of information being passed between us. 

If you would like to check out the show, it is linked in below...

To learn more about Ninon and her amazing contributions to society you can visit her at NINON SPEAKS

If you loved the show and would like to visit Voices of Tomorrow again you can find the show at Real Coaching Radio-TV Network by following the link below...


Jean Victoria Norloch